Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
Hey. You dropped and smashed your road beer in my store last night. Again. And this time you didn't even order anything. You just walked in, yelled "SWEDISH STYLE!" Then lost your beer, looked depressed, and left.
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
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