do herpes really smell.
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
Some rando guy literally just put my shoes on and tied them for me because I'm drunk... Is this what it feels like to be a princess?
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
Randomize
