Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
Randomize
