he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
He has the fingertips of a God
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
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