Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
I put a bagel at the end of my bed so every time I want a bite I have to do a sit up
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
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