plz talk dirty to me
Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
I had to explain to the waiter that I'm not the DD because I can't drive, but as the Designated 'Make Sure No One Gets Roofied Or Hit By A Car On The Walk Home'-er, I should still get the free drinks.
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
Randomize
