Dude, I couldnt get it up cause she said her parents were home...
ok, come over...I have doritos
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
If I could tell my younger self three things it would be: 1. Smoke a lot more weed 2. Have a lot more sex 3. Own a good set of pots and pans
Randomize
