i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
The time stamp on this text message is reason enough alone to not leave me unsupervised
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
Randomize
