Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
I just looked at my iPhone gps history... "the gas station", "the park with a big scary fence", "the trampoline", and, my favorite, "where we were when we were about to do lines off a bible".
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
You told everybody that you were a dragon and then projectile vomited all over the kitchen.
Randomize
