operation harelip BJ is a go
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
Woke up with puke in my bed and my pockets full of Tootsie Rolls.
Jealous.
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
It's hard to judge what a reasonable amount of cereal looks like in the spaghetti pot. We're out of cap'n crunch and milk.
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
