Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
Oh god our sink is a cavalcade of horrors. Brb sacrificing a goat and putting everything in the dishwasher forever
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
This hobo said he can't buy alcohol bc he got in trouble bc a girl sat on his face when he was passed out and misaligned his spine and gave him Alzheimer's so Ali is buying him a bottle. This is Vegas.
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
I just made myself 3 peanut butter sammies because I was too hungry to watch porn
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