hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
Randomize
