Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
Going on a first date tonight...pros: my boobs look amazing. Cons: my abortion isn't until next week.
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
I'm reading 50 shades of grey and masturbating while he's doing insulation downstairs. Maybe I can get him to bring me a sandwich
You know those times when you're sitting down for a while and r like damn I'm sober but then stand up and r like WOAH HOLD UP.
Randomize
