You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
I can now recognize that when my wine bottle reaches a certain point, I probably shouldn't tweet, text or call anyone. RESPONSIBILITY
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
I just used the proceeds from selling my ex's engagement ring to fund my first date with another girl.
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize
