Do you think "I had sex with my co-worker last night I don't think I can come in today" is a good excuse?
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!!
I take back everything I said about communal showers
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
The bouncer just called me magically delicious... apparently I'm a lucky charm. hollllleeeerrrr!
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