he changed my name in his contacts to "rick", so his mom wouldn't know he was texting me
He's doing the 1:45AM lap: he goes around the bar, finds the hottest crying girl 15 minutes before close, and brings her home. I would feel bad for the girls if it wasn't such incredible genius.
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
I had to help you off the toilet floor because you couldn't get up, then you threw your drink on the floor and just said "oh dear" really calmly.
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
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