you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
Randomize
