I'm calling you out on twitter if you don't come over right now.
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
How I know that I'm single: when I get a save the date for a wedding & I read "& guest" my first thought was does my bottle of Jack Daniels count.
I need water and some morals
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
Randomize
