Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
When this bachelor party is over and your life is in ruins, you have my permission to die.
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
Then you got drunk and shit in her car. Nothing before that matters. She isn’t calling you back.
Randomize
