I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
drunk doesn't even begin to explain it. dude called him and said to bring you back because he'd already called dibs.
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
Mom brought home a 36 pack of Smirnoff and was all "ring any bells?" and then winked. I'm scared. What does she know?
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
Randomize
