Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
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