Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
I'll have a whole suitcase of emergency bacon with me obviously
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
What's the protocol for doing tequila shots at a baseball game when you're chaperoning for a church group? You know, hypothetically.
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize
