he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
Like, he's a nice guy. But he's better at fingering than he is at speaking.
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
Randomize
