Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
I went home with a guy last night because he showed me some magic tricks and kept shouting "THEY'RE ILLUSIONS MICHAEL!"
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
