do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
He's saved in my phone as 'MURICA. I think it's safe to say I'm not exactly taking him seriously.
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
You punched me in the face while blackout. 20 min later I told you I'd been punched in the face and you yelled 'by who, imma go kill 'em!'
Had a girl with a moustache tattoo on her hand give me a handjob. That shit was classy as fuck. I felt like I should be wearing a monocle or something.
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
Randomize
