You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
If I don't quit picking up guys when I'm drunk, I'm going to need a vagina transplant.
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
Randomize
