OMFG I JUST SAW SOMEONE GIVING SOMEONE ELSE ROAD HEAD AND THEY HIT A POTHOLE. my day has been officially made.
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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