Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
