I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
She brought an overnight bag to my party. Might as well have shown up wearing only a thong and a bottle of whip cream in her hand.
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
Dude, so the police showed up at my house with my wallet told me they found it in the church fountain then handed me a pamphlet on AA saying it was from the pastor. What happend?
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
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