1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
I feel like I should put "don't judge me" in the special instructions for the pizza guy.
I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits"
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
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