This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
I got tossed from adult league soccer for telling a 55 year old I'd break his hip. I'm a productive member of society
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
Randomize
