i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
your all-time low pick up line was when you asked a girl "Are you rock-staring at me?"
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
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