Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
What kind of gift says "I'm sorry you accidentally stuck your hands in my puke (even though you should know better by now)"?
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
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