god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
Did Neil Armstrong say the moon was too far away! NO! He built himself a fucking rocketship is what he did!
the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
Dear Mark, please dispose of your crusty mcdonalds napkins used to jerk it at my desk
discrete masterbation is a lost art
I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits"
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
I wanted him to come me this time. So I told him last time I was in the city I hit a lady on the head with an inflatable Santa Claus and just found out that the restraining order she requested against me was granted. We never hung out.
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
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