So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
Who knew you could get a drunk in public when jogging with your dog?
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
Randomize
