and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
Randomize
