margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
Just pulled over to throw up in a day care parking lot while the kids were outside playing. The adults were mortified.
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
Hurricane Harvey ruined my dick appt. WTF?!
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
What are you doing tomorrow?
Dude its my bday. Im drinking from sunup til face down. Rinse and repeat.
Randomize
