my mom heard me say 'don't squirt that at me' while me & him were in my room. She then decided to call my aunt and complain to her that she has the sluttiest daughter in town. she refused to believe me when i told her i was talking about gel.
I'm with your mom on this one.
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
Uh I almost got the bride to go down on me. I'm the smoothest maid of honor ever.
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
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