I am drunk raised to the nth degree. The possibility of getting sick is approaching infinity.
If Curt Schilling could pitch a game with that blood-filled sock... if Tiger Woods won the 2008 US Open with a torn ligament, then I'd be an embarrassment to the human race if I couldn't manage to at least jerk him off even if I was still crying after he put it in my butt.
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
I'm mumbling to people and trying not to accidentally shit my pants
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
He was literally screaming at me for using the same knife to scoop the peanut butter and the jelly.
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