Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
He's living a porn movie. He's slept with a waitress at her work for lunch, a bar tender at the bar that night, and the cleaning lady the next morning.
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
I wrote notes to myself all over my body. "don't yell at cops again" "Cody stole your phone" "you kissed Cody" "vodka shots are bad for your liver" and "cactus pretty" WTF????
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
From now on he's gonna have to shave first. It feels like I got eaten out by a chainsaw!
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