sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
Why do I feel so obligated to masterbate just because I’m single and it’s valentines Day...
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize
