Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
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