tell your sister to shave her snatch
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
What not to say at an interview: i can wrap the shit out of some food.
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
I'm smoking a bowl in my bathtub. I'm meant to be alone.
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
Randomize
