oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
I might be getting fired on this week so the only option i see for tonight is to get smashed and have an orgy. actually this idea might explain why i'm not an ideal employee.
Randomize
