And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Randomize
