Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
Come see our sink grown plant.
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
Ran into a tinder match at the bar last night. We spotted each other and started making out without speaking any words to each other. Fuck yea technology!
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
Randomize