i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
Drunk me really does appreciate that sober me made a list of movies to watch when drunk it saves so much time
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
Randomize
