i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
Good news: I actually puked in my bathroom, the vomit from the living room was actually from someone else.
That's horrible but hilarious
I'm going to miss college.
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
No one needs to know about the barren wasteland that is my vag. Sometimes i visualize my cervix rocking back and forth wondering where everybody went.
I just pictured that. It's reading a book.
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
THERE ARE NO EMOJIS TO SHOW MY SEXUAL FRUSTRATION
Randomize
