her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
Randomize
