i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
Why is there a cactus in the microwave?
Don't worry about it.
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
You know its bad when convincing your mother you were masturbating is the better alternative
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
I’m also apparently a very socialist drunk now
Instead of a horny one. All I want to fuck is capitalism these days.
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
Randomize
