it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
I'm on tinder and every time somebody says something too creepy for me I start quoting scripture at them. My boobs are like missionaries.
After you puked in the bathtub you claimed you were never eating quesadillas again and you never even ate a quesadilla
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
Randomize
